There's a worry, that Monika is already connected to the Thoth academy. That Monika will find out or know she's doing this, and then--who knows what? She's sorry, she said, but Sayori can't shake off the fear that she's been carrying ever since she saw the other girl.
Is she real now? Or is she still a program? Trying to find out herself hasn't gone very well, so...
So. It's sending e-mails and hope they go anywhere. Even if it's a dead end, a dead end is safe. ]
Hi, Dr. Ishigami,
I'm sorry for bothering you, but my friend has a problem and we don't know who to go to. We have to be careful, so sorry for the suspicious e-mail...
My friend came from a game before arriving here, and there was someone who hurt them there. They're here now. They don't know if they're real now, or if that person can still hurt them by getting to their code.
Please help us. If there's anyone you know that can help, or if you can help...
But please don't tell anyone about this. We don't know who that person knows. But if you can give us a name first, that would be safest.
Thank you for your time, Doctor.
[ It feels dangerous. But she sends it, and hopes for the best. ]
[ It’s a bit of a strange email, certainly, but it’s not like he minds. He hesitates at not telling anyone, but he supposes it’s no different than his patient confidentiality. ]
Anonymous,
I got your email. I believe I understand the situation. This person was essentially code and now they don’t seem to be and you’re wondering if there’s something that can be exploited.
I might be able to help with that. Both in determining what kind of form you’ve taken and potentially patching up exploits. I used to dabble in hacking and writing code when I was a child.
As a doctor who has treated patients, I adhere to the tenets of the medical profession and as such this is entirely a confidential conversation.
I would be able to meet with both of you if you’re amenable to that. Feel free to send me any questions you might have for me.
[ The response back is immediately terrifying, and that anxiousness clings to her when she actually opens it, reads it. She won't say she has hope, though there's a giddiness in her--there's so much that could still go wrong, and relying on others... she can't help but feel she's wasting this person's time. Or is it fear that makes her feel that way?
Sayori considers actually asking someone to come along with her - Makoto seems so strong a character, if anything went wrong - but she brushes away the thought immediately. She can't get other people involved and worried about her. ]
Senku, (not Dr Senku?)
Thank you. Um, we don't have any questions right away, since we don't know what the situation is with my friend. But we'd like to meet you as soon as possible. If that's okay.
Thank you so so much...
- Anonymous
[ She really had to keep going back and switching 'I' to 'we' there.... ]
You can call me that if you like, but I’ve never been one to stand on ceremony.
I’m at the School of Thoth most days, except Sundays, pretty much all day, working on various projects. If you have a preference on a meeting place, I can make a house call. I don’t mind.
You need only tell me when and where. I’ve picked up a teleportation ability, which makes it easy to get around.
Sayori's been all nerves since making contact, and those nerves don't leave at any point. They only become tucked away for a while, between some unknown time and before she takes the steps to reach the school in Wintermute. It's a disorienting journey, either because of the bizarre nature of Folkmore, or all because of herself.
She keeps to herself the entire time, even when she finally enters the school: using signposts to help guide her around, the handy maps here and there to lead her steps. He gave her a wide berth of time, and Sayori takes it so as not to feel late. She just has to hope he's there when she finally arrives, right?
Which, she does. Outside a door, those nerves back in full force. She breathes, tucks a strand of her darkened pink hair behind an earlobe, and finally--after holding her hand in a fist by her side, telling herself to do it--knocks on the door, speaking out a 'Hello?' on the other side, waiting for a response. And either because she receives one, or time passes long enough, that makes Sayori try the door, open it and peek in...
[ Senku did call to invite her in, he's in his office, with some papers strewn across his desk. It's schematics he happens to be working on, he's working on a rocket to test the upper limit of this place. ]
Hi. Come in. [ Senku makes a beckoning motion. He sits down in his chair, there's a chair on the other side of his desk. He'd been standing because he always does. He's not wearing his lab coat, but he is wearing slacks and a button down with a tattered cape tied around his shoulders.
Although he's used to working and talking at the same time, he will be polite and stop what he's doing, tossing the pencil aside and giving her his full attention. ]
That would be me. [ He looks young, perhaps, only 27 in appearance like he might be fresh faced out of school if he weren't so old. ]
He was the one in the room, she had asked the question, but it doesn't make Sayori any less surprised to find out it's true. She closes the door behind her all the same, turning back to him to really take in his features.
It hasn't quelled the nerves at all, and it's a temporary distraction if anything as she steps more inside. ]
Umm, hi. Eh... heh, I...
[ She's fiddling with her hands, smiling, but it's strained against her face. Her fingers tug on the edges of her sleeves, and she huffs a laugh again, messes once more with the side of her hair. ]
I, um, spoke with you about a problem? Over e-mail.... [ Ah, she can't be so coy, right? If he's a professor, he must get a lot of e-mails. Still, she doesn't want to be immediately direct, so: ] I have a friend... she doesn't come from a world like other people...
[ She doesn't come from any world at all, she thinks to say, but doesn't--her lips clasp too tightly to allow her. ]
Right. The matter of the digital world. [ Senku is caught up in an instant and while he can see she is nervous? He would guess nervous. He's not clear why, so he doesn't remark on it. ]
Well, I can tell you from talking to people here that they are all from different kinds of worlds, although I'm not sure if anyone else would say that. My first question would be does she have a physical, tangible form?
[ She’s rewarded with a smile, he has a sense of humour after all. ]
Okay, so a tangible form. I don’t know what kind of form that would be, if it’s just a solidified version of her usual form, or if she’s been given a human or humanoid form. I could do some testing to find out what she’s dealing with, if you like. [ That’s the first thing. ]
If you’re dealing with a flesh and blood body, there likely isn’t any connection at all to your digital world, therefore there would be nothing to exploit. We could try and investigate it all the same to make sure, but it’s highly unlikely.
If you are dealing with some solidified digital form, then we could take a look at seeing if there is some connection or exploit that could be found. [ This is what Senku is thinking at least. ]
And, should there be, put safeguards in place to avoid unwanted interference.
[ Sayori finds it easy to listen to him. A hope that stirs within her at the consideration that she might be real flesh and blood, a feeling she tries to keep fleeting, but it sticks to her. What if? Though the young doctor presents the next possible option that may as well throw that hope entirely out the window...
She's quiet for a moment, but finally admits with a look that would be more sheepish, if not for sadness more present above it: ] ...well, she's me-- I'm my friend. [ She looks down briefly. ] I was afraid to admit it because I didn't know if the person who deleted me came here, but...
[ She looks back at Senku, her worry and fear not entirely gone, but she has to reach out, doesn't she? Hope, though her hands tighten all the more. ]
I want to know what I am... I don't want her to hurt me again. I'm really trusting you, Doctor Senku...
[ Her voice is a touch lower when she admits that to both him, and herself. She has no other choice. She needs to. ]
[ Senku looks like he’s listening to her and he nods a little bit. ] I understand your concerns, and your caution. [ He’s not offended. ]
So. How do you want to proceed? We could go through an exam to see what kind of form you have. It’s encouraging that you appear to be solid, there’s nothing immediate that tells me you’re digital. Nothing like a hologram.
[ Is she flesh and blood? He doesn’t know yet, but if she is, she also might not know how to handle that. ]
I'll follow your lead, doctor. [ There's a spark of humour in that, but she's nerves, and it shows. She's going to find out such a big question--the possibility that she could be real. ] You'll be my first ever real exam!
Um, well- [ ah, maybe she should explain- ] I've never even had a fake one, ehe...
[ She offers her wrist, extending her arm, watching at first expectantly, but then looking away when she realises that--she doesn't want to watch, it's too much! She sucks in a breath, releases it slowly...
...and despite the motions that she makes, feels going through herself, the nerves, everything, Senku will feel...nothing, in any of that time. Even as Sayori manages to get somewhat calm under this not-very-pressuring pressure. ]
Hmmm. You don't have a pulse. [ He reports this with curiosity, not judgment. ]
That doesn't necessarily mean much around here, if I'm honest. I'd like to listen to your chest all the same. I want to know if there's anything to hear at all. [ He opens a drawer and pulls out a stethoscope and gets to his feet, it's fine, he'll come around. ]
[ N-no pulse? But how--? Sayori looks at him with a mix of shock and horror, feeling in her chest her heart skip. She wants to protest, but he's already speaking, and while there's a "reassurance" in what he says, Sayori can only hear repeating in her head: no pulse, no pulse. ]
Y-- yes! [ She doesn't get louder, but she's clearly rattled, and her chest is moving, even feeling it herself. There's a heart beating in there, she knows it! Panicking, but she's trying to keep her breathing steady.
And she does move her hand away, not knowing if he'll be able to hear anything through the fabric of her shirt, if she needs to move it. But then, she's not even thinking about that. ]
I-if I don't breathe, I'll die. [ Which...is the obvious, but she knows that. That's the same, isn't it? Or so Sayori is telling herself, gripping tightly at the ends of her sleeves; when, meanwhile...
Senku won't get any indication of a heartbeat, once he listens. ]
[ If she has a pulse and a heartbeat, it’s not something he’s detecting. It doesn’t necessarily mean she’s not alive. She’s clearly there in front of him and her chest is moving. Whether or not he can hear her breathing is a different matter, he can see she’s doing it. ]
That’s correct, you would. [ He’s gentle, he doesn’t move her clothing or anything but close enough he’s getting a sense of her breathing at least. ]
Just because I can’t hear it, doesn’t mean nothing’s going on.
[ She tries to take comfort in his words, to make herself believe them--to not think too deeply about what's happening, or what's not (and that should be). Because she can hear it herself: her own heartbeat increasing, the sound of the air she takes into her lungs.
And yet, Senku doesn't hear any of it--not even the intake of air into her lungs, if he were to listen to her breathing through her nose. ]
We thought... everything was real, you know... we didn't know none of it was just a game. Even when I knew everything, being in the classroom, Natsuki's cupcakes... I could taste them.
[ Was there any connection? Or is the connection only in the fallacy going on? Natsuki's cupcakes were never real--Natsuki was never real. Yuri, her childhood friend...
Maybe she's just blabbering, not knowing what else to do, as she looks away from Senku's hand, or any part of him, through this check-up. ]
That makes sense to me, considering your entire world was real to you as much as my world was real to me, just because it's a game to someone else...
[ Senku is thinking. Sure, he can't hear the sound of her breathing, but she's clearly doing it. So, probably not a human, but that really doesn't mean much in this place, there are tons of people from outside the scope of his knowledge.
He taps his finger on his hip briefly as he thinks it over. ]
Under your clothes, have you looked yourself over for anything out of the ordinary? Any ports or panels, anything that could establish a connection to a computer?
The question flusters her a little, though she's thinking, wondering--would she have something like that? Looking down at herself in her clothes and at her arms isn't really useful, but...
"Where would something like that be? Um, I didn't have anything like that in the game..."
But does that matter? She's clueless, she doesn't even know why she exists as she does, but--maybe Senku would know something? Does it matter if she had it in the game or not?
I couldn’t say where it would be specifically, but if you haven’t noticed anything...how about connection. Do you feel a connection to the network on the relic or anything like that?
[ If she’s her own entity, there might not be any way to hack into her so to speak, which would be good. ]
But maybe if I was inside it...? Um, I wouldn't know how to do that, but when I knew what was happening inside the game, I could see the files and coding...
But there’s nothing like that now? You may not actually be connected to anything, which could mean on some level you are tangibly real and not just code. [ She feels real, and while she might not be functioning the same as an ordinary human would – that doesn’t mean anything. There’s lots of different species here. ]
That would protect you from hacking and changing your status based on your game files. If they don’t exist here then...
[ She could be real. Though, being real sounds hard to grasp, or define in this instance--is she as real as she can be under these circumstances? Something in-between a human and a program. It feels like a haze to think about, but... ]
So as long as I'm like this, I could be okay... no one can connect to me, or--put me in a game.
[ That's what he's saying, and she's focusing on the hope of that. She can't be hurt like that--she can't be deleted. ]
I would suggest checking, making sure you have no ports or anything, no network or online capabilities that aren't on your relic. If there's no way to connect you to any data at all, I would think that there would be no way for that to happen.
[ Senku confirms this with a nod. ]
Now...the trials however, that I can't make any promises about. The fox does what she wants, but even if someone tried to harm you or kill you in some way, she would bring you back. We're all here at her desire.
She's been wondering about the trials, but her knowledge of them has been limited, and the idea that she could die in one... It does keep Sayori quiet, unsure of what first to say.
But- ] What...happens in them? Would someone really do that...?
[ Kill someone. And why? What benefit was there...? ]
[ The trials can be a lot and Senku gives it a bit of thought. ]
In one trial, I was faced by a sphynx that insisted I admit something I didn’t want to discuss and when I didn’t it bat me around like a cat toy. [ His tone is a bit dry saying that. ]
Most trials seem to be about dealing with your past or any outstanding issues. Often there are other pockets of reality, or you might see things you don’t otherwise being around here. It can be uncomfortable. I can’t guess what the fox will test you with, but if you find yourself in a trial, take a deep breath. [ Senku advises first. ] Look for another one of us, because working together is better than being alone, and find your way out of it. You’ll end up back here.
[ That doesn't sound very nice at all, does it. She sits her hands on top of one another, taking in his words quietly, nodding. ]
...a lot about this place, it's about making us confess... [ Slowly, she remembers- ] A cute puppy had me do that with someone when I first arrived. It wasn't anything deep, but... is that really how we'll become better people? Sharing things about each other to everyone...?
[ It's odd... or maybe it's not like that at all, but Sayori's still thinking about it. ]
[ Senku is not trying to scare her, but rather, he believes in being prepared. ]
It is. I think the fox is a fan of psychological things. I don't know if it makes us better people or not. I know it can be healthy to talk things out, maybe that's the reasoning. Someone like me who doesn't carry secrets though, it's hard to say. Even that wasn't a secret, it was to demand a definition that we didn't feel we needed.
[ It encourages thinking about, thought there's no coming to any real answer without speaking to the fox themselves. Sayori has a secret--one shared right in this room, and one she doesn't plan to speak of outside this room. But how far can she get away with that?
It's difficult. It's troubling. ]
...I'll remember what you said, [ she finally says. ] Thank you... I appreciate it. All of this... I guess I should start thinking up some secrets or issues I don't mind sharing! Ehehe....
[ She cups the side of one of her cheeks in a silly motion, a little forced, but smiling now all the same. She has to keep her chin up, doesn't she? ]
I think most people find it difficult, I just don't have much of a filter. [ Senku snorts slightly. ]
Just remember, you won't be alone and if things get rough you can reach out to people. If no one else, myself and my partners would be glad to help you.
[ It's a struggle, where she doesn't want to impose herself too much on a person, and yet--she's taking what Senku has said to heart, how this place forces difficult confessions out of people, and how she'll need to rely on others. ]
Then... is it okay if I can talk to you again, if I need to? I'm not ready to let people know about me...
[ It's so awkward, and it's not what she wants to be known as. But she ducks her head, adds- ]
I don't know why it should come up! But if this place is so strange and wants us to confess every little thing, it might try and make me talk about it? And it's new to me, too...
[ It would be nice to think she could have someone to fall back on, to be sure about it, even though Senku just very well offered to help. But she can't help but ask, to be sure. ]
I don’t mind. I’ll do my best. I’m not the greatest with matters of the heart exactly, but my partner is if I’m really stumped. [ He’ll do his best. ]
It just might make you try and talk about it yes, but otherwise I don’t see why you have to let anyone know anything you don’t want them to. To me you seem like a perfectly ordinary young woman like any other person, you’re tangible, and I would suggest that means you’re as real as anyone else. Your origins don’t really matter in that case, do they?
[ That she was digital material doesn’t matter now as far as he’s concerned. ]
If you say so...? [ It's not said sarcastically; rather, she's still got that sheepish energy as-- ] I don't know if it matters. There's things I can't talk about with people, since I don't have a lot of memories... I only have a couple of days' worth.
[ And sharing that something doesn't come easily, and yet--speaking with Senku, someone who does know, does make it easier for Sayori to reveal that. Because he might know better than her if it would cause any troubles, especially in an environment as this one. ]
But if that shouldn't be a problem, then... I'm really glad! I'd like to make new memories. Real memories. [ She smiles. ] Even some of the memories I have, they didn't happen, you know...? I've never lived out full days before, until now.
You seem to be taking everything in stride. It's a good thing to make new memories, I think. [ She clearly doesn't have to tell all of this to everyone she meets, but she could just live her life like a regular girl. ]
I imagine things are quite different. In that case I would suggest maybe trying out as many new things as you can. You might find things you enjoy.
That's actually a lot for me. [ Trying new things. She smiles about it, even sounds joking about her real state of affairs, but--it's embarrassing! ]
But I will! And I'll try and meet people and get to know them, so I can lean on them for the trials. Not too much! [ She doesn't want to be a burden! ] But-- so we can help each other through this. I hope.
[ Really, she hopes she's not the most pathetic person in Folkmore who needs people, and nobody else does. ]
That it may be. If it’s daunting consider trying one thing. [ He’s really not the best for mental health advice – that’s Gen’s area of expertise. ]
It can’t hurt to meet others, but I wouldn’t worry about that. Everyone has different strengths that come into play when it comes to trials. I wouldn’t put me in a combat situation, I would definitely hide behind a skilled fighter. [ Completely without shame too. He knows his weakness. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
chiming
un: 1234abcedf, e-mail/text
Date: 2024-06-02 09:39 am (UTC)From:There's a worry, that Monika is already connected to the Thoth academy. That Monika will find out or know she's doing this, and then--who knows what? She's sorry, she said, but Sayori can't shake off the fear that she's been carrying ever since she saw the other girl.
Is she real now? Or is she still a program? Trying to find out herself hasn't gone very well, so...
So. It's sending e-mails and hope they go anywhere. Even if it's a dead end, a dead end is safe. ]
Hi, Dr. Ishigami,
I'm sorry for bothering you, but my friend has a problem and we don't know who to go to. We have to be careful, so sorry for the suspicious e-mail...
My friend came from a game before arriving here, and there was someone who hurt them there. They're here now. They don't know if they're real now, or if that person can still hurt them by getting to their code.
Please help us. If there's anyone you know that can help, or if you can help...
But please don't tell anyone about this. We don't know who that person knows. But if you can give us a name first, that would be safest.
Thank you for your time, Doctor.
[ It feels dangerous. But she sends it, and hopes for the best. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-04 02:15 am (UTC)From:Anonymous,
I got your email. I believe I understand the situation. This person was essentially code and now they don’t seem to be and you’re wondering if there’s something that can be exploited.
I might be able to help with that. Both in determining what kind of form you’ve taken and potentially patching up exploits. I used to dabble in hacking and writing code when I was a child.
As a doctor who has treated patients, I adhere to the tenets of the medical profession and as such this is entirely a confidential conversation.
I would be able to meet with both of you if you’re amenable to that. Feel free to send me any questions you might have for me.
And you can just call me Senku.
- Senku
no subject
Date: 2024-06-04 09:24 am (UTC)From:Sayori considers actually asking someone to come along with her - Makoto seems so strong a character, if anything went wrong - but she brushes away the thought immediately. She can't get other people involved and worried about her. ]
Senku, (not Dr Senku?)
Thank you. Um, we don't have any questions right away, since we don't know what the situation is with my friend. But we'd like to meet you as soon as possible. If that's okay.
Thank you so so much...
- Anonymous
[ She really had to keep going back and switching 'I' to 'we' there.... ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-06 09:41 pm (UTC)From:I’m at the School of Thoth most days, except Sundays, pretty much all day, working on various projects. If you have a preference on a meeting place, I can make a house call. I don’t mind.
You need only tell me when and where. I’ve picked up a teleportation ability, which makes it easy to get around.
-Senku
i'll move to action next tag!
Date: 2024-06-08 09:35 am (UTC)From:We'll visit the school soon. Thank you. I don't know a lot of places yet, so...
We'll visit tomorrow.
- Anonymous
no subject
Date: 2024-06-10 03:12 am (UTC)From:→ action!
Date: 2024-06-10 03:58 pm (UTC)From:--An easier thing said than done.
Sayori's been all nerves since making contact, and those nerves don't leave at any point. They only become tucked away for a while, between some unknown time and before she takes the steps to reach the school in Wintermute. It's a disorienting journey, either because of the bizarre nature of Folkmore, or all because of herself.
She keeps to herself the entire time, even when she finally enters the school: using signposts to help guide her around, the handy maps here and there to lead her steps. He gave her a wide berth of time, and Sayori takes it so as not to feel late. She just has to hope he's there when she finally arrives, right?
Which, she does. Outside a door, those nerves back in full force. She breathes, tucks a strand of her darkened pink hair behind an earlobe, and finally--after holding her hand in a fist by her side, telling herself to do it--knocks on the door, speaking out a 'Hello?' on the other side, waiting for a response. And either because she receives one, or time passes long enough, that makes Sayori try the door, open it and peek in...
And shuffle on in. ]
Ehehe, um... hello? Doctor Senku?
[ Hi. Just a 5'1 young woman entering on in...! ]
→ action!
Date: 2024-06-10 04:53 pm (UTC)From:Hi. Come in. [ Senku makes a beckoning motion. He sits down in his chair, there's a chair on the other side of his desk. He'd been standing because he always does. He's not wearing his lab coat, but he is wearing slacks and a button down with a tattered cape tied around his shoulders.
Although he's used to working and talking at the same time, he will be polite and stop what he's doing, tossing the pencil aside and giving her his full attention. ]
That would be me. [ He looks young, perhaps, only 27 in appearance like he might be fresh faced out of school if he weren't so old. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-11 03:51 pm (UTC)From:He was the one in the room, she had asked the question, but it doesn't make Sayori any less surprised to find out it's true. She closes the door behind her all the same, turning back to him to really take in his features.
It hasn't quelled the nerves at all, and it's a temporary distraction if anything as she steps more inside. ]
Umm, hi. Eh... heh, I...
[ She's fiddling with her hands, smiling, but it's strained against her face. Her fingers tug on the edges of her sleeves, and she huffs a laugh again, messes once more with the side of her hair. ]
I, um, spoke with you about a problem? Over e-mail.... [ Ah, she can't be so coy, right? If he's a professor, he must get a lot of e-mails. Still, she doesn't want to be immediately direct, so: ] I have a friend... she doesn't come from a world like other people...
[ She doesn't come from any world at all, she thinks to say, but doesn't--her lips clasp too tightly to allow her. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-11 08:00 pm (UTC)From:Well, I can tell you from talking to people here that they are all from different kinds of worlds, although I'm not sure if anyone else would say that. My first question would be does she have a physical, tangible form?
no subject
Date: 2024-06-11 09:15 pm (UTC)From:As for that question: ] Ummm.... yes? She can move around, touch things, eat things... Nothing's fallen through her yet!
[ It's a poor attempt at a joke that she doesn't even sell to herself. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-13 08:59 pm (UTC)From:Okay, so a tangible form. I don’t know what kind of form that would be, if it’s just a solidified version of her usual form, or if she’s been given a human or humanoid form. I could do some testing to find out what she’s dealing with, if you like. [ That’s the first thing. ]
If you’re dealing with a flesh and blood body, there likely isn’t any connection at all to your digital world, therefore there would be nothing to exploit. We could try and investigate it all the same to make sure, but it’s highly unlikely.
If you are dealing with some solidified digital form, then we could take a look at seeing if there is some connection or exploit that could be found. [ This is what Senku is thinking at least. ]
And, should there be, put safeguards in place to avoid unwanted interference.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-14 03:17 pm (UTC)From:She's quiet for a moment, but finally admits with a look that would be more sheepish, if not for sadness more present above it: ] ...well, she's me-- I'm my friend. [ She looks down briefly. ] I was afraid to admit it because I didn't know if the person who deleted me came here, but...
[ She looks back at Senku, her worry and fear not entirely gone, but she has to reach out, doesn't she? Hope, though her hands tighten all the more. ]
I want to know what I am... I don't want her to hurt me again. I'm really trusting you, Doctor Senku...
[ Her voice is a touch lower when she admits that to both him, and herself. She has no other choice. She needs to. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-16 10:24 pm (UTC)From:So. How do you want to proceed? We could go through an exam to see what kind of form you have. It’s encouraging that you appear to be solid, there’s nothing immediate that tells me you’re digital. Nothing like a hologram.
[ Is she flesh and blood? He doesn’t know yet, but if she is, she also might not know how to handle that. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-19 12:47 pm (UTC)From:Um, well- [ ah, maybe she should explain- ] I've never even had a fake one, ehe...
no subject
Date: 2024-06-23 03:39 pm (UTC)From:May I have your wrist for a moment? I'm going to check to see if you have a pulse.
no subject
Date: 2024-06-25 12:01 pm (UTC)From:...and despite the motions that she makes, feels going through herself, the nerves, everything, Senku will feel...nothing, in any of that time. Even as Sayori manages to get somewhat calm under this not-very-pressuring pressure. ]
no subject
Date: 2024-06-26 10:00 am (UTC)From:That doesn't necessarily mean much around here, if I'm honest. I'd like to listen to your chest all the same. I want to know if there's anything to hear at all. [ He opens a drawer and pulls out a stethoscope and gets to his feet, it's fine, he'll come around. ]
Are you breathing?
no subject
Date: 2024-06-28 11:39 am (UTC)From:Y-- yes! [ She doesn't get louder, but she's clearly rattled, and her chest is moving, even feeling it herself. There's a heart beating in there, she knows it! Panicking, but she's trying to keep her breathing steady.
And she does move her hand away, not knowing if he'll be able to hear anything through the fabric of her shirt, if she needs to move it. But then, she's not even thinking about that. ]
I-if I don't breathe, I'll die. [ Which...is the obvious, but she knows that. That's the same, isn't it? Or so Sayori is telling herself, gripping tightly at the ends of her sleeves; when, meanwhile...
Senku won't get any indication of a heartbeat, once he listens. ]
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Date: 2024-06-30 05:02 pm (UTC)From:That’s correct, you would. [ He’s gentle, he doesn’t move her clothing or anything but close enough he’s getting a sense of her breathing at least. ]
Just because I can’t hear it, doesn’t mean nothing’s going on.
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Date: 2024-07-01 09:09 am (UTC)From:[ She tries to take comfort in his words, to make herself believe them--to not think too deeply about what's happening, or what's not (and that should be). Because she can hear it herself: her own heartbeat increasing, the sound of the air she takes into her lungs.
And yet, Senku doesn't hear any of it--not even the intake of air into her lungs, if he were to listen to her breathing through her nose. ]
We thought... everything was real, you know... we didn't know none of it was just a game. Even when I knew everything, being in the classroom, Natsuki's cupcakes... I could taste them.
[ Was there any connection? Or is the connection only in the fallacy going on? Natsuki's cupcakes were never real--Natsuki was never real. Yuri, her childhood friend...
Maybe she's just blabbering, not knowing what else to do, as she looks away from Senku's hand, or any part of him, through this check-up. ]
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Date: 2024-07-01 05:46 pm (UTC)From:[ Senku is thinking. Sure, he can't hear the sound of her breathing, but she's clearly doing it. So, probably not a human, but that really doesn't mean much in this place, there are tons of people from outside the scope of his knowledge.
He taps his finger on his hip briefly as he thinks it over. ]
Under your clothes, have you looked yourself over for anything out of the ordinary? Any ports or panels, anything that could establish a connection to a computer?
[ He is going somewhere with this. ]
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Date: 2024-07-01 06:03 pm (UTC)From:The question flusters her a little, though she's thinking, wondering--would she have something like that? Looking down at herself in her clothes and at her arms isn't really useful, but...
"Where would something like that be? Um, I didn't have anything like that in the game..."
But does that matter? She's clueless, she doesn't even know why she exists as she does, but--maybe Senku would know something? Does it matter if she had it in the game or not?
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Date: 2024-07-06 06:15 am (UTC)From:[ If she’s her own entity, there might not be any way to hack into her so to speak, which would be good. ]
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Date: 2024-07-06 01:47 pm (UTC)From:[ But, she's thinking... ]
But maybe if I was inside it...? Um, I wouldn't know how to do that, but when I knew what was happening inside the game, I could see the files and coding...
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Date: 2024-07-13 07:37 pm (UTC)From:That would protect you from hacking and changing your status based on your game files. If they don’t exist here then...
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Date: 2024-07-15 12:39 pm (UTC)From:So as long as I'm like this, I could be okay... no one can connect to me, or--put me in a game.
[ That's what he's saying, and she's focusing on the hope of that. She can't be hurt like that--she can't be deleted. ]
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Date: 2024-07-17 10:24 pm (UTC)From:[ Senku confirms this with a nod. ]
Now...the trials however, that I can't make any promises about. The fox does what she wants, but even if someone tried to harm you or kill you in some way, she would bring you back. We're all here at her desire.
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Date: 2024-07-18 01:17 pm (UTC)From:She's been wondering about the trials, but her knowledge of them has been limited, and the idea that she could die in one... It does keep Sayori quiet, unsure of what first to say.
But- ] What...happens in them? Would someone really do that...?
[ Kill someone. And why? What benefit was there...? ]
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Date: 2024-07-19 05:38 pm (UTC)From:In one trial, I was faced by a sphynx that insisted I admit something I didn’t want to discuss and when I didn’t it bat me around like a cat toy. [ His tone is a bit dry saying that. ]
Most trials seem to be about dealing with your past or any outstanding issues. Often there are other pockets of reality, or you might see things you don’t otherwise being around here. It can be uncomfortable. I can’t guess what the fox will test you with, but if you find yourself in a trial, take a deep breath. [ Senku advises first. ] Look for another one of us, because working together is better than being alone, and find your way out of it. You’ll end up back here.
The best thing to remember is that trials end.
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Date: 2024-07-22 10:24 am (UTC)From:...a lot about this place, it's about making us confess... [ Slowly, she remembers- ] A cute puppy had me do that with someone when I first arrived. It wasn't anything deep, but... is that really how we'll become better people? Sharing things about each other to everyone...?
[ It's odd... or maybe it's not like that at all, but Sayori's still thinking about it. ]
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Date: 2024-07-26 06:25 pm (UTC)From:It is. I think the fox is a fan of psychological things. I don't know if it makes us better people or not. I know it can be healthy to talk things out, maybe that's the reasoning. Someone like me who doesn't carry secrets though, it's hard to say. Even that wasn't a secret, it was to demand a definition that we didn't feel we needed.
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Date: 2024-07-27 01:00 pm (UTC)From:[ It encourages thinking about, thought there's no coming to any real answer without speaking to the fox themselves. Sayori has a secret--one shared right in this room, and one she doesn't plan to speak of outside this room. But how far can she get away with that?
It's difficult. It's troubling. ]
...I'll remember what you said, [ she finally says. ] Thank you... I appreciate it. All of this... I guess I should start thinking up some secrets or issues I don't mind sharing! Ehehe....
[ She cups the side of one of her cheeks in a silly motion, a little forced, but smiling now all the same. She has to keep her chin up, doesn't she? ]
It's hard~ for a girl like me~
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Date: 2024-07-31 11:17 pm (UTC)From:Just remember, you won't be alone and if things get rough you can reach out to people. If no one else, myself and my partners would be glad to help you.
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Date: 2024-08-06 11:29 am (UTC)From:Then... is it okay if I can talk to you again, if I need to? I'm not ready to let people know about me...
[ It's so awkward, and it's not what she wants to be known as. But she ducks her head, adds- ]
I don't know why it should come up! But if this place is so strange and wants us to confess every little thing, it might try and make me talk about it? And it's new to me, too...
[ It would be nice to think she could have someone to fall back on, to be sure about it, even though Senku just very well offered to help. But she can't help but ask, to be sure. ]
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Date: 2024-08-13 02:24 am (UTC)From:I don’t mind. I’ll do my best. I’m not the greatest with matters of the heart exactly, but my partner is if I’m really stumped. [ He’ll do his best. ]
It just might make you try and talk about it yes, but otherwise I don’t see why you have to let anyone know anything you don’t want them to. To me you seem like a perfectly ordinary young woman like any other person, you’re tangible, and I would suggest that means you’re as real as anyone else. Your origins don’t really matter in that case, do they?
[ That she was digital material doesn’t matter now as far as he’s concerned. ]
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Date: 2024-08-14 02:04 pm (UTC)From:[ And sharing that something doesn't come easily, and yet--speaking with Senku, someone who does know, does make it easier for Sayori to reveal that. Because he might know better than her if it would cause any troubles, especially in an environment as this one. ]
But if that shouldn't be a problem, then... I'm really glad! I'd like to make new memories. Real memories. [ She smiles. ] Even some of the memories I have, they didn't happen, you know...? I've never lived out full days before, until now.
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Date: 2024-08-19 09:33 pm (UTC)From:I imagine things are quite different. In that case I would suggest maybe trying out as many new things as you can. You might find things you enjoy.
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Date: 2024-08-21 03:25 pm (UTC)From:But I will! And I'll try and meet people and get to know them, so I can lean on them for the trials. Not too much! [ She doesn't want to be a burden! ] But-- so we can help each other through this. I hope.
[ Really, she hopes she's not the most pathetic person in Folkmore who needs people, and nobody else does. ]
Sorry about the wait, I got sick.
Date: 2024-09-02 02:59 pm (UTC)From:It can’t hurt to meet others, but I wouldn’t worry about that. Everyone has different strengths that come into play when it comes to trials. I wouldn’t put me in a combat situation, I would definitely hide behind a skilled fighter. [ Completely without shame too. He knows his weakness. ]